Beta Read online

  "Twenty-six. Is that an issue?"

  "Just making sure you're legal," I used his words against him.

  He laughed lightly, "Fair enough. So what's your story?"

  I shrugged, added the veggies to the mix, and placed a lid on top.

  "There's not much to tell."

  "What is your family's rank?"

  I bit my lip, "We don't have one..."

  "You don't?"

  "Nope. We're just normal, every day wolves. Nothing special."

  "Your Alpha knew you by name though."

  I nodded as I sat next to him, "He's never been a fan of mine."

  "Why?" he asked suspiciously.

  Do I tell him the real reason my Alpha doesn't care for me? How would he take it? I mean, I would have to tell him eventually so what better time than now?

  "Okay, you have to promise you won't be mad," I said cautiously.

  "Did you sleep with him?" He asked tightly.

  "No," I said quietly, "That's the problem."

  "He wanted you to?!"

  "It was a couple years ago and-" I started to explain but he cut me off.

  "Did you date him?"

  I pursed my lips for a moment, "I've never dated anyone."

  "Anyone?"

  "That's what I said."

  "So you're-"

  He didn't finish his sentence but I had a feeling he was going to ask about my virginity. I knew the question would eventually come up and I already knew he wasn't a virgin so I should disclose my status.

  "I'm a virgin."

  "Good," he said with a relieved smile, "I would have hated to fight with your current Alpha."

  "Yes, well, I was saving myself for, well I guess you," I mumbled with realization, "And he asked me out a few times but I declined and ever since then he hasn't liked me much."

  "I see. Well I couldn't be happier that you saved yourself for me," he said proudly, "Though I wish I could say the same about myself."

  I went to stir the mix on the stove but really, I just didn't want him to see my jealousy. I was envious of the other women he slept with because I always wanted to be my mate's first. I thought it would be special but I understood and didn't hold it against him. I knew male wolves had it rough when it came to controlling their primal urges. They were designed to be that way, territorial, protective, and at times overbearing. It only got worse the further up in rank they were. Honestly, I was surprised he hadn't staked his claim on me yet. I was sure the urge to claim what was his would be coursing through him.

  "So how many have there been?" I asked.

  "Why do you want to know?"

  "So I can know how long to be mad."

  "You're mad? Or are you jealous?" He asked with a devious smirk.

  I rolled my eyes and went back to stirring, "Tell me."

  "Ten."

  I nodded, trying so hard to not let it affect me but I failed miserably. I wondered how I would feel every time I looked at Christian. Would I resent him because he was the product of Titus being with another woman? Could I bring myself to love Christian and care for him as if he was my own son?

  "Are you disappointed?" He asked.

  I shrugged, "A little but I understand."

  "Can you accept Christian?"

  Fair question, I guess. I put the lid back on and sat next to him, resting my chin in my palm.

  "I'm not going to lie, I'm young and a little selfish. I care more about school than I do my own health so throwing a kid in the mix, especially one that isn't mine is going to be rough."

  He nodded as if he was deep in thought, "You know, I hardly know you but I would do anything for you...but my son will always come first."

  I smiled lightly at him, "That's exactly what I wanted to hear."

  "Just wanted to make sure we're on the same page."

  "Yep. So I guess you don't have much time for hobbies outside of being Beta and Christian."

  "No, not really," he agreed, "What about you?"

  "I dance," I said absently.

  "What kind of dance?"

  "Ballet. But, I don't have much time these days."

  "School?" He guessed.

  "Yea. I go to school from eight to three then homework or studying the rest of the night."

  "I thought you said you're twenty-two," he said confused.

  I nodded, "I am."

  "How are you graduating from medical school?"

  I couldn't help but flash him a big smile, "I was accepted at fifteen."

  He looked surprised by how young I was and how quickly I finished school.

  "Are you a genius or something?"

  "Card carrying member of MENSA," I said proudly.

  "So my mate is a certified genius," he mused.

  "So what are you going to do with that?"

  "I always wanted to be a pack doctor. Would you be opposed to that?"

  "Do whatever will make you happy," he encouraged, "I think that's an excellent career choice. Until we have children," he added.

  I laughed nervously. I had never had sex and I did not want to think about children yet but I knew he was at a different point in life and he was ready to settle down and have a family. Hell, I didn't even know if I was capable of pleasing him considering my lack of experience. He would know what do with me but I didn't want it to be one sided. I wanted him to be happy with me and that meant I wanted to satisfy him in every way possible.

  "Let me adjust to Christian first," I said nervously.

  I didn't give him a chance to respond before I got up to finish dinner. I sprinkled a little hot sauce in the pan and stirred everything around. What if I never felt ready for kids? I didn't have much of a choice since Christian was already in the picture.

  I pulled out plates and silverware and started piling up a plate for Titus before serving myself. I couldn't believe I felt anxious giving him his plate but I did. I sat and carefully took a bite. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched as he took his first bite though I'll admit, I was more focused on his features once I looked at him. He really was perfect and I wondered how more women hadn't thrown themselves at him. Maybe they had but he didn't go for them. I noticed a light scar just under his left ear and running down to disappear under his shirt. I wondered how he got that. It must have been horrible because usually wolves don't scar.

  "This is amazing, Elizabeth," he commented, "Where did you learn to cook?"

  "Taught myself," I said with a light smile. I doubted he knew exactly how much his opinion meant to me and it would probably be best to keep that to myself for now.

  "Of course you did. What else have you taught yourself?"

  "Everything," I said a little uncomfortable.

  I didn't like talking about all the things I taught myself because it meant I had to talk about my family. That was not something I really wanted to discuss at the moment.

  "Everything?" He asked skeptically.

  I set my fork down, feeling my nerves go haywire. He had a right to know how I grew up and what led me to be the way I am.

  "My parents abandoned pack life right after I was born for a religious cult. I was raised in a setting that did not allow it's members to read or write so any child born into the cult was illiterate. My parents sent me to stay with my brother on weekends so no one could accuse them of cutting me off from the pack and when I was with him, I took his daughter's books and taught myself how to read and write. When I was about seven, I would go to the junior college and just read on every subject I could. I had mastered Shakespeare by nine and animal physiology by ten."

  I looked over at him to gauge his reaction to my story. There was nothing glamorous or proud in my childhood. I hadn't grown up in a loving home. I only had Adrian and that was because I secretly taught him how to read and write. We were close because we helped each other survive as children.

  "So how did you end up here and in college?" He asked. I could sense he was masking a great deal of anger listening to my childhood but he wanted to know.

/>   "My parents...um, they knew something bad was going to happen and they sent me to my brother's... three days later, they were dead. I was almost eleven when it happened and when I took the standardized tests to see what grade I should be in, I tested at a college level. I was put in specialized classes and graduated high school just before I turned fifteen and went to college."

  I ended my emotionless tale and went back to eating. I knew it would look odd if I didn't cry or feel bad about the situation but I had worked so hard to lock away that part of my life, I wasn't going to let this crack that open. Perhaps some day I would allow myself to grieve the loss of my childhood and parents but I had too many other things to focus on.

  "That is... that's an amazing history. It certainly explains a lot."

  "Like what?"

  "The OCD, the-"

  "I do not have OCD. I just happen to know that everything has a place and time and that without order, things fall apart."

  A teasing smile played on his lips, "Whatever you say, Elizabeth."

  I heard his phone ringing but he seemed to ignore it in favor of looking at me.

  "Aren't you going to get that?"

  "You don't mind?"

  "No. Could be important."

  He answered his phone so I took the opportunity to clean up the dishes and start the dishwasher.

  He sighed, "Sorry, but Christian won't stop crying. I'm going to see if I can calm him down."

  I turned back to him and nodded as I dried my hands.

  "You could come with me if you want," he offered, "No pressure though."

  I chewed on my lip, thinking. I wasn't sure if I was ready to meet Christian yet but I guess now is as good a time as any. I looked down at what I was wearing a remembered I was still in running attire.

  "Do you mind that I'm dressed like this?"

  He offered me a half smile, "You're beautiful in anything, I'm sure."

  I couldn't help but blush a little at his comment but if he thought I looked fine, then I was fine.

  "Okay, well, lets go," I mumbled.

  His smirk widened a bit, "After you."

  *******

  We walked the half mile to the giant pack mansion he was staying at. I had only been here for pack meetings even though they never concerned me. Only high ranking families lived in the pack house and I was not part of that society.

  He held the front door open for me and followed me into the grand foyer. I followed him up two flights of stairs to a solid wood door that he didn't hesitate to open. A young woman, maybe in her late twenties, cradled a hysterical baby in her arms though she didn't look very happy about it.

  "He's doing it again," she complained, clearly exhausted by Christian.

  I listened to the way he was crying and took note of his clenched fists and curled up legs.

  "Does he do this a lot?" I asked.

  "Same time every day for about an hour," Titus responded, "The doctor said there's nothing wrong with him and he just misses his mother."

  I cocked my head to the side as I watched the girl pass son to father. Christian didn't let up even when Titus tried to comfort him.

  "He's two months, right?"

  "Yea," Titus responded though he was clearly distracted.

  "Do you mind if I try something?" I asked.

  He shook his head and handed Christian over to me. I tried to block out the hysterical cries from the baby in an attempt to concentrate. I placed my hand on his stomach to feel a tight abdomen just as I thought.

  "Colic," I mused, "Can we get a warm bath going?" I asked.

  Titus looked over at the girl and she rushed to the bathroom as I laid Christian on the bed to undress him. I felt Titus watching me silently but he let me take control of the situation. Christian wailed the entire time I undressed him and carried him into the bathroom. I tested the water before I slipped him into the water. For a few minutes, I lightly rubbed his stomach in the warm water and he started to relax. I was a little afraid it wouldn't work at first but as his crying subsided, the adult tension in the room faded as well.

  "What did you do?" The girl asked, relieved.

  "Well, no one really knows what causes colic and it's often misdiagnosed. There's no medicine or apparent triggers for it but sometimes it can help to rub the stomach in warm water. It relaxes the muscles," I explained as I still lightly rubbed his stomach.

  Titus ran a hand through his hair as he sat at the edge of the tub. The girl shook her head absently and left the room.

  "How did you know?" He asked.

  "I read a book about infant diseases when I was twelve."

  "Of course you did," he said with a light laugh.

  I smiled lightly and finally really looked at Christian. He looked a lot like Titus but his eyes were a chocolate brown instead of the warm hazel of his father. His cheeks were chubby and almost as pale as me but still holding true to his father's sun kissed color. I had to admit, he was a really cute baby.

  Christian started splashing the water and laughing. He grabbed my hand every so often but quickly released it every time.

  A light knock on the already open door pulled my attention to a stern looking man I assumed to be Titus's Alpha. I instantly averted my eyes and slightly bowed my head in respect for a visiting Alpha.

  "Zac, this is Elizabeth, my mate. Elizabeth, this is Zac, my Alpha."

  "It's nice to meet you, Alpha," I said respectfully.

  "You don't need to be formal around me," he said lightly, "You're my Beta's mate. That makes you family."

  I smiled lightly at him, finally looking at the man that was my future Alpha. He was typical of an Alpha, strong, handsome, well built but in my opinion, no comparison to Titus.

  "Congratulations," Zac said to Titus.

  "Thanks."

  "Crying again?" Zac asked though he already knew the answer.

  Titus nodded but glanced at me, "He was but she stopped it."

  "Really?"

  He nodded, "She's about to graduate from medical school. Turns out, she's a genius."

  "Medical school, huh? You don't look a day over eighteen," Zac commented.

  "I'll be twenty-three in a few weeks," I said as I took Christian out of the bath.

  Titus handed me a soft towel, "I'm not just saying that. She's a member of MENSA."

  "Oh. So literally a genius."

  Titus nodded, "She wants to be a pack doctor."

  "That would actually work well since we're absorbing Dark Moon," Zac mused.

  "I have another month left in school and I would still need to work with a pack doctor before I could work on anyone," I cut in, "Diapers?"

  Titus motioned to the bedroom, "By the bed."

  I left the men to get Christian changed and dressed. Being a wolf, he wouldn't get too cold but I didn't want to take any risks. His big, milk chocolate eyes watched me curiously as I moved him to one arm and reached for the diapers at the same time. Apparently I needed to grow an extra arm to handle a child. I laid him down, put a diaper on him, and redressed him. He looked sleepy so I sat on the bed with my legs crossed and pulled Christian into my arms. I was surprised at how natural caring for a baby came to me. I had never been around children and I had never held a baby so this was all new to me.

  Within minutes, he was fading to sleep and Zac was leaving the room with a light wave at me. I smiled lightly, not wanting to wake Christian.

  Titus sat next to me mostly watching Christian but his attention never fully left me.

  "You're really good with him," Titus said low in my ear.

  His close proximity sent goosebumps all over my skin. I can't believe I hadn't noticed how good he smelled until he was this close. It was masculine and clean, almost like a fresh rain and all too tantalizing. Even though I didn't want him to stop, he made me nervous. I couldn't control how he made my body react and that scared me. I never wanted to lose control of my life or myself. I had worked too hard and too long to gain control of my life and I couldn't ruin that.
/>
  "Thanks," I said awkwardly.

  I heard him laugh lightly as he rested his forehead on my shoulder. I loved the way skin to skin contact felt with him. I felt unbelievably complete with him near me and when he touched me, it was like nothing else mattered.

  "I love that you're so innocent."

  "You do?" I asked nervously.

  He met my eyes like I was crazy for thinking otherwise, "Why wouldn't I? I'll be the first and the last man to ever touch you."

  "But I mean...I don't... I won't know what I'm doing," I said so quietly I wasn't sure he heard.

  Usually if I didn't know something, I just read about it and retained the information but this wasn't exactly something I could just read about. I hated to admit I didn't know how to do something but I was really lost in this arena.

  "Elizabeth," he said as he placed a finger under my chin. I let him guide my attention to his eyes, searching for something.

  "You are perfect," he said with such conviction I damn near believed him, "Everything you do will always be perfect. I am happy you have no experience with men. That means that everything you experience will be with me."

  He really believed I was perfect, didn't he? Something about his statement was assuring. His approval was all that mattered to me which was so unlike me.

  "You think so?" I asked.

  "I know so. I only wish I had done the same."

  I nodded absently and looked down at Christian, "Well, think about it this way, you have Christian now and you wouldn't have had him if you waited."

  He smiled at me, "See? You are perfect."

  I laughed quietly, "I didn't think it would be this easy."

  "What do you mean?"

  "Holding him. I thought I was going to resent him but I don't. I mean, it's kind of cool I could calm him down."

  "I'm glad you like him. And thanks for calming him. I don't know what I'm going to do without you for a month."

  I shrugged so lightly Christian wouldn't feel it, "You can visit me or I can come see you."

  "The problem is, I don't ever want to be away from you."

  "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

  He smiled and shook his head, "Lets put him to bed and I'll take you home."

  I passed Titus his son and followed him next door where the girl sat on her bed with a crib directly next to it.